Can Anybody Hear Me?

I hesitated to write
what I really wanted to say
but the words that come from my mouth
go right past your ears anyway

You say you can't help it
the fact that you feel that way
he's gonna be different this time around
I don't really care what they say

I admire your optimism
in spite of all events that transpire
but you have to learn that leopard's don't change their spots
no matter what your heart may desire

I hope you know you're not the first
nor will you be the last to bare your soul to me
I wish that one day you all could understand
what you're infatuation has made you blind to see

I thought about not speaking out
about just letting this one slide
but I wasn't sure that I could live with the guilt
live with the thought that I never really tried

So I cried out in protest to you
to try and make you understand
but still you chose to spend your time
with the one that you wanted to give your hand

I grow so tired of screaming
of having my voice lost in the noise
to see so many struggle aimlessly
all for the affection of certain boys

There's something more for you out there
something that I hope that one day you shall see
for you are not here just for selfish pleasure
you were created to be royalty...

But still you all stress and strive
all for the attention of one of us
most of whom only want one thing
"I'm gonna get this girl in my bed or bust!"

I really wish I could tell you
that things aren't really like that you see
but the more I look around my life
that idea is spread around like some disease

So let me scream out again
to those who are made like me
show a little respect for once in your life
God gave women to be more than just property

You see we're called to love them
as Christ loved the church
the last time I checked we weren't doing that very well
because I don't remember Christ treating his people like dirt

So cherish those who you are lucky enough to have
and if you don't think it's meant to be don't lead them along
it's hard enough for some to find love in this world
without you serenading with your cheesy love songs

So as I send this out to the world
I pray with all of my might
that my words would not fall on deaf ears
and that someone would hear me tonight

Am I ok?

Am I ok?
It's such a loaded question.
Can I be ok when the world around me attacks?
When the ones that should build me up teat me down?
Am I ok?
But what does ok really mean anyway?
I'm here aren't I? Isn't that enough?
Do I have to be more than just here?
Can I not just relish in the fact that I'm here for one more day?
I say to you today no!
I can't be complacent one more day.
I can't be complacent another second.
If a day is truly like a 1000 in Your kingdom, then I've wasted generations in my complacency.
Am I ok?
I can't be ok anymore.
Ok is gone for me, from this day on. You have made me more than ok.
You have made me more than what I see in myself.
You have made me to be Yours.
Am I ok?
No longer can I be that way
Oh Lord, I pray.

Together as one

as I sit in nokia theatre I can't help but be amazed by what I see. Black and white, sick and healthy, young and old, the downtrodden and the blessed. All coming together in the name of the one that we have the audacity to call father. The same God who tore open the heavens to declare his pleasure in the one who came from Him, we come to as if He is simply another person in our life. But when I think about, that is the way that God created us to act towards Him. We are nothing, and yet God has called us His own. He has called us his children. He has called us His friend. And as I worship with my family in Christ around me, I can't help but feel weighed down by the fact that we proclaim to be one body when the situation fits our needs, such as here in dallas on this night. Yet we go to our church and we go to our school and we set up our boundaries. It's time the walls come down. It's time that we embrace G3. It's time to become 1.

Emptiness

As I walk through another day
pondering all the uncertainty that still clouds my way
I cry out for help from God
to again make straight this crooked way
to give me enough light for yet another day

"Why aren't you listening to me?
Why can't I hear you speak?
Are we really just going at this alone?
If you're still there why don't you speak?
Why can't you just let me know that you still hear me?"

I know I'm here for something more
to do more than just check my emotions at the door
For the present time I will wait for your plan to be revealed
I'll continue to walk your path through the open door
and pray that at the proper time you will lead me into something more

"My child why do you continue to worry?
You know so well that I've never left you.
All your life I have been right by your side.
For all your life I shall never leave you?
So why in this moment do you continue to worry?"

"Things are different this time, can't you see?
I've gone all my life and even now there is only me.
I know that you created us to be relational beings,
so why in the world is it still just me?
is there something wrong with me that I just can't see?"

"My child, My child, of course there is nothing wrong.
for I created all the world that you can see
and the most delicate balance between death and life
surely through my revelation you must now see
that from Me there can come nothing that is made wrong?"

"I tell you now my child, your time will come.
I am preparing you both even now to be one
to be the man and woman that I have raised up to carry my Word
when I am finished with you both, you shall be one.
Until then please by patient, your time has not yet come."

"My God, my God, forsake me not for my doubt!
I'm just truly scared to continue to live without.
I know that there is one out there that you have for me.
And I know that you have not created me to be left out.
Please God up above remove from me this doubt."

So until that moment comes I'll wait
on pins and needles until that coming day
when the one that is out there for me is brought into sight
when finally reach that slowly coming day
the emptiness I feel will finally go away: I can't hardly wait.

The Power of One

Last night we had our third community worship service which was held at the apartment of Omari Head and Erik Robinson. Each time that we have gathered we have increased in number, a visual confirmation of what each of us has felt God calling us to enact in Waco and in Truett Seminary.

In the past week we have bear witness to some incredibly amazing things in the lives of our fellow seminary students. Two of our students were involved in a car wreck and escaped almost completely unscathed, and another student's mother who has been severely sick and hospitalized was healed completely and walked out of the hospital doors under her own power. I myself have seen the power of Christ recently in being called to be the pastor of a small church in Coryell county.

These things that we have seen are a testimony to the power of Christ in our lives and the power of prayer that we have been granted. We as a group friends, nay as a family have made the choice to not be content with "making mud pies in the slums" but rather that we will press on towards something more, so that we might bring a revival amongst our school and our town.

We will no longer sit idly by and wait for the things to come.

Through Christ, we are stronger. We are passionate. We are convicted.

We are the Eklektos, and through Christ, we are ONE.

Time for a Change

I can't hardly believe that it has been over 2 months since I put fingers to keys and brought my thoughts to the world wide web. In a way, that 2 months has been the most eventful of my short life. Since last writing I have been hired as the pastor of Pearl Baptist Church, as well fallen in love with the scriptures that we call the Bible. These scriptures have always been a part of my life, but at this point in my life they have begun to speak to me in ways that I never thought would be possible with any written medium.

I had a conversation with a buddy of mine at Truett this morning where he told me that he appreciated my stories that I had written and that I was a good writer, so I guess you might say that he has convicted me that I need to write on my blog more often.

I brought to the attention of my covenant group this morning that I needed for something to change. As I told them this morning, I don't really know what it is, but something in my life right now just isn't right. I'm where I know that God has called me to be in school, I have more friends than I've ever had at one point in time, and I have been called to pastor a church where I am quickly falling in love with the people that I minister to, and yet something feels like it is missing. All I can do for now is pray that God would reveal this thing to me. Something needs to change. Maybe it is me, or maybe it's those around me, but I need something different.

I wish I could explain what that something was so that maybe I could try and find it, but until it is revealed to me by God, I will just have to continue on the path that has been revealed. So if you've been thinking of me recently, for whatever reason, don't just dismiss it. Pray for me, and I'll do the same for you when you come upon my mind. It's time for a change, and prayer is a great place to start when something needs to change.

Grace and Peace

William Allen Nelson